Work Stress Solutions
Stress at work can destroy your life
So you work for a top company, and you are an important person in the grand scheme of things. Your constant companion is a blackberry outside of the paid working hours that your salary brings. It is a prerequisite of the job, that you carry this device on you at all times because of the importance of the position.
Days and weeks go by and you start to notice that you are putting in fifteen to twenty hours of extra work, above and beyond the stated expectations, because of the demands of the position and the device assigned to you. But you want to make a good impression and continue to use it, without putting in for overtime. Times are tough and you need to make that great impact to your new boss and company to show them you will be there to answer the bell whenever it rings.
This goes on for months and now the expectations you have set are always expected without any complaining from you.
Your ego is in full bloom and you make sure your authority is asserted every chance you get. Many of the people you are in charge of are noticing that you are micro-managing them, contacting them outside of normal hours, using the blackberry, regarding business concerns. They begin to resent you while you make a positive impression on your new employers, but things are starting to look up for you in this company because of your extra efforts, so you are unconcerned.
Every day grumblings are heard more and more frequently from the employees because of the stress you put them under. You tow a tough line. Some people you are in charge of start to resign, or you fire one or two, siting that assets for the organization are easy to find and everyone is expendable.
The job starts to affect your life at home.
The wife and kids rarely see you, and when they do, you are busy gazing into that wondrous crackberry that keeps you connected to your job. It starts to create friction at home. A little at first, and then it begins to snowball. Any help you used to give your wife on duties, such as; dishes, cooking, house chores, spending time with the kids, spouse support are now neglected. The kids become frustrated because the love their father used to show, is being focused on the job and blackberry.
Days and weeks go by and you start to notice that you are putting in fifteen to twenty hours of extra work, above and beyond the stated expectations, because of the demands of the position and the device assigned to you. But you want to make a good impression and continue to use it, without putting in for overtime. Times are tough and you need to make that great impact to your new boss and company to show them you will be there to answer the bell whenever it rings.
This goes on for months and now the expectations you have set are always expected without any complaining from you.
Your ego is in full bloom and you make sure your authority is asserted every chance you get. Many of the people you are in charge of are noticing that you are micro-managing them, contacting them outside of normal hours, using the blackberry, regarding business concerns. They begin to resent you while you make a positive impression on your new employers, but things are starting to look up for you in this company because of your extra efforts, so you are unconcerned.
Every day grumblings are heard more and more frequently from the employees because of the stress you put them under. You tow a tough line. Some people you are in charge of start to resign, or you fire one or two, siting that assets for the organization are easy to find and everyone is expendable.
The job starts to affect your life at home.
The wife and kids rarely see you, and when they do, you are busy gazing into that wondrous crackberry that keeps you connected to your job. It starts to create friction at home. A little at first, and then it begins to snowball. Any help you used to give your wife on duties, such as; dishes, cooking, house chores, spending time with the kids, spouse support are now neglected. The kids become frustrated because the love their father used to show, is being focused on the job and blackberry.
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Tensions rise at home, and your wife starts to become stressed as a result of the job. She sees you less and less, and is trying to do work of her own, outside of house chores, and she needs your help. Fights start at home and new pressures continue at work.
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Your wife cannot even get you as an audience to seriously talk about the problems the job is causing. The job has made you completely un-reliable as a father and a husband, but you seem oblivious to the situation because you are bringing money home to the family. Using the blackberry as the reason, you start making excuses, which results in your wife virtually raising the kids on her own during this time.
At work the job gets tougher, and cuts are rumored. This drives you harder resulting in just about everyone - at home and work - disliking you. Your marriage starts to fall apart at home, and your kids hardly know you anymore. The stress you are under at work hardly makes the job worth it, but the pay is excellent, you are an important person, and must maintain this lifestyle. You do lunches, make business decisions, and feel like you are the king of a country. When in reality, outside of the business you are in, and the people you deal with, very few people really know you, want to know you, or care who you are. Your ego has drawn up a facade that you believe is true.
In this tale, a number of things have happened.
The children don't feel loved anymore and resent you. You are one or two fights away from a divorce with your wife. The increased stress at work has some health concerns popping up, and the employees that still work for you, and used to work for you, hate you.
Is it worth it? Your ego thinks it is, because you feed it self importance day after day. You are convinced the company can't run without you, and you may have some carrots dangled such as; bonuses and stocks to keep you running on the hamster wheel.
Before the job you were happy and healthy and had a great relationship with your wife. You spent time with the kids loving to play with them any chance you could get. Since the job started, health issues have brought you frequent visits to the doctor and the clinic. Your blood pressure has gone far above normal, and you are at risk for serious health issues happening to you.
Without really knowing, you have seriously negatively touched the lives of a number of people, including the people closest to you, and hurt yourself in the process. This isn't just the fault of the blackberry, the device has played a large role in it, but your ego has run you like a slave. Like a wrecking ball, you have left a path of destruction that has affected the lives of many people.
This type of story is really not an exaggeration. These devices detract time spent with loved ones, for seemingly important decisions to be made twenty four hours a day. It can get to the point where the person in this type of scenario will start to dream about work and cannot get it out of their head. The lifestyle is accepted as normal, and it is anything but.
Be a good judge when looking for, and accepting jobs. Remember, the company should be lucky to have you, not the other way around. For you have decided to siphon off valuable time to help them make sound decisions and move their business forward. Yes you are getting paid, but draw a line in the sand to show them where the job stops, and the family starts. If that is not acceptable by the company, then look for another job elsewhere before your life spins out of control. If you like this kind of job, and have left your family behind, ask yourself why you got married in the first place if you are not going to share the duties at home and be with the people you love.
Nobody is here to be used as a virtual slave. Having a theoretical ball and chain around your ankle is a sure sign to look for something better, change careers, and/or look inwards to receive guidance on the next set of decisions to make in life.
We are not here to live the life of someone else's dreams. We are here to live the life of our dreams.
At work the job gets tougher, and cuts are rumored. This drives you harder resulting in just about everyone - at home and work - disliking you. Your marriage starts to fall apart at home, and your kids hardly know you anymore. The stress you are under at work hardly makes the job worth it, but the pay is excellent, you are an important person, and must maintain this lifestyle. You do lunches, make business decisions, and feel like you are the king of a country. When in reality, outside of the business you are in, and the people you deal with, very few people really know you, want to know you, or care who you are. Your ego has drawn up a facade that you believe is true.
In this tale, a number of things have happened.
The children don't feel loved anymore and resent you. You are one or two fights away from a divorce with your wife. The increased stress at work has some health concerns popping up, and the employees that still work for you, and used to work for you, hate you.
Is it worth it? Your ego thinks it is, because you feed it self importance day after day. You are convinced the company can't run without you, and you may have some carrots dangled such as; bonuses and stocks to keep you running on the hamster wheel.
Before the job you were happy and healthy and had a great relationship with your wife. You spent time with the kids loving to play with them any chance you could get. Since the job started, health issues have brought you frequent visits to the doctor and the clinic. Your blood pressure has gone far above normal, and you are at risk for serious health issues happening to you.
Without really knowing, you have seriously negatively touched the lives of a number of people, including the people closest to you, and hurt yourself in the process. This isn't just the fault of the blackberry, the device has played a large role in it, but your ego has run you like a slave. Like a wrecking ball, you have left a path of destruction that has affected the lives of many people.
This type of story is really not an exaggeration. These devices detract time spent with loved ones, for seemingly important decisions to be made twenty four hours a day. It can get to the point where the person in this type of scenario will start to dream about work and cannot get it out of their head. The lifestyle is accepted as normal, and it is anything but.
Be a good judge when looking for, and accepting jobs. Remember, the company should be lucky to have you, not the other way around. For you have decided to siphon off valuable time to help them make sound decisions and move their business forward. Yes you are getting paid, but draw a line in the sand to show them where the job stops, and the family starts. If that is not acceptable by the company, then look for another job elsewhere before your life spins out of control. If you like this kind of job, and have left your family behind, ask yourself why you got married in the first place if you are not going to share the duties at home and be with the people you love.
Nobody is here to be used as a virtual slave. Having a theoretical ball and chain around your ankle is a sure sign to look for something better, change careers, and/or look inwards to receive guidance on the next set of decisions to make in life.
We are not here to live the life of someone else's dreams. We are here to live the life of our dreams.
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